I asked my friend to comment about my series.
He told me that it somehow lacks a few emotions here and there, especially on Chelsa's part.
For others who don't know yet, I've been writing this mini-series for a while. And I'm writing it in little pieces of hearts and post it in the glass windows of a cafe in Vega named Ristretto.
That's why I'm limited to a few set of words per episode.
Because of this comment (and the feeling of being limited in a piece of heart), I'm thinking of expanding each episode.
I'll add some new pieces of story to each episode making it a little bit colorful...
What do you think?
*Note*
Please wait for Episode 8, I'm still in the process of encoding it. :D
*Note #2*
If I will go full-blast about this, I'm thinking of making a small book about it... and all other episodes written here after Episode 8 will be a trailer episode so as not to have spoilers.
*Note #3*
I am thinking also of making a small movie about it. I'm now actually writing a small script and cast description. If you want to take part, just email me or comment here.
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 06, 2008
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
SLW Mini-Story Series: Cup of Love (2:7)
Week 2: Episode 7: Happy Fudge II
Entry date: Febuary 1, 2008, Friday
"Kuya, itry niyo yung bago namin... Happy fudge"
Happy fudge... Tinanong ko kung bakit happy fudge ang name... Sabi nina ate ay may nagsuggest ng name daw kahapon after eating it... Pampasaya daw kadi. Hence, happy fudge...
Sa totoo lang... Tama nga siya... Kung sino man ang nagsuggest ng name na yun... "it brighten up my day" ika nga... Sobrang sarap...
"Kuya! Feb na! May date ka na ba?" biglang tanong nina ate...
Oo nga no? Feb na... It's been a very long time since nung last "date" ko...
Would I ask Chelsa out this Feb?
Siguro... Kung wala man siyang gagawin sa 14... Or date... I will ask her out..l and then ibibili ko siya nitong Happy Fudge...
-Mark's blog
Monday, February 04, 2008
SLW Mini-Story Series: Cup of Love (1:6)
Week 2: Episode 6: Happy Fudge I
Entry date: January 31, 2008, Thur
The day started bad for me...
First, I didn't get an invite to meet Christine of HappySlip next thursday. Then, I have to attend meeting after meeting after meeting... Then, my special problem or SP is not yet finished... Sigh... Too much stress...
So I decided to go back and visit this café to relieve my stress. Dito ko nakilala yung may-ari nung place, si kuya Jaz. He suggested to try his new creation.
Masarap... Mainit yung chocolate sa loob ng fudge... I asked kung anong pangalan nung fudge, sabi niya wala pa..
Sabi ko, "Happy fudge" na lang... Because napasaya ako after kong kainin...
Sarap
-Chelsa's blog
Friday, February 01, 2008
SLW Mini-Story Series: Cup of Love (1:5)
Week 1
Episode 5: Trying to Remember
Entry date: January 30, 2008, Wed
I only have a few minutes to write, I need to be at the town mall by 630pm. Anyway, natanong ko na din kahapon si Lisa about kay Chelsa... At ang ngiti.. Panalo talaga si Lisa, ang dami agad nasabi...
"Nililigawan mo ba?"
Ang ganda ng tanong e... Siyempre... Hindi pa... Gusto ko muna may background akong alam bago pumorma diba? Good thing payag si Lisa na tumulong...
Hmmmm... Come to think of it... Parang nakita ko na si Chelsa before... Parang nakilala or nakita ko na siya somewhere... Di ko lang matandaan...
Whooops!! 630 na!! Tapusin ko na itong hot cocoa ko...
-Mark's Journal
Thursday, January 31, 2008
SLW Mini-Story Series: Cup of Love (1:4)
Week 1: Episode 4: The Surprise Question
Entry date: January 29, 2008, Tue
We met again ni Lisa kanina sa café for our lunch. Tulad ng dati I ordered my favorite cheezy pasta and hot cocoa. Tulad ng dati kwentuhan parin kami... From subjects, to teachers, to TV shows, to telenovelas, to people, to friends, to food... Any topic under the sun...
Then she asked me a question na hindi pa nya tinatanong before...
"Ano ba gusto mo sa isang lalaki?"
Napatigil ako sa tanong niya. I asked why. She said "Wala lang" and then changed the topic...
Bakit kaya niya yun natanong?
-Chelsa's Blog
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
SLW Mini-Story Series: Cup of Love (1:2)
*Note*
The stories are also posted at the glass windows of Ristretto Cafe. I think they have posted Episode 3 today. I'll be there later to write Episode 4.
Week 1:Episode 2: Cheezy Trail
Entry date: January 25, 2008, Fri
"Isang Cheezy pasta and hot cocoa"
Yun ang aking order kanina sa café. It was my 2nd time here actually at naging paborito ko agad ang cheezy pasta nila. Parang tulad ng luto ni mama...
Namiss ko tuloy si mama...
Oh well... Paguwi ako bukas ay sasabihin ko ito sa kanya at idadala ko sila dito ni papa pagdumalaw sila dito sa LB. Pero bago yun, may meeting pa mamaya so dito muna ako...
Hmmm... Share ko lang, yung guy na-umorder kanina after me ay cheezy pasta din ang binili... Paborito niya rin kaya yun?... Oh well...
- Chelsa's blog
The stories are also posted at the glass windows of Ristretto Cafe. I think they have posted Episode 3 today. I'll be there later to write Episode 4.
Week 1:Episode 2: Cheezy Trail
Entry date: January 25, 2008, Fri
"Isang Cheezy pasta and hot cocoa"
Yun ang aking order kanina sa café. It was my 2nd time here actually at naging paborito ko agad ang cheezy pasta nila. Parang tulad ng luto ni mama...
Namiss ko tuloy si mama...
Oh well... Paguwi ako bukas ay sasabihin ko ito sa kanya at idadala ko sila dito ni papa pagdumalaw sila dito sa LB. Pero bago yun, may meeting pa mamaya so dito muna ako...
Hmmm... Share ko lang, yung guy na-umorder kanina after me ay cheezy pasta din ang binili... Paborito niya rin kaya yun?... Oh well...
- Chelsa's blog
SLW Mini-Story Series: Cup of Love (1:1)
*Background*
I started this mini-story series last January 24, 2008. I was inspired by the "heart" filled glass window of the Ristretto Cafe and thought of "contributing" something like a series. So I came up with a mini-story and each episode corresponds to the date it was written. Here is the first episode of the mini-story series. Enjoy...
(Yeah I know the title is mushy...)
Week 1: Episode 1: First Time
I started this mini-story series last January 24, 2008. I was inspired by the "heart" filled glass window of the Ristretto Cafe and thought of "contributing" something like a series. So I came up with a mini-story and each episode corresponds to the date it was written. Here is the first episode of the mini-story series. Enjoy...
(Yeah I know the title is mushy...)
Week 1: Episode 1: First Time
Entry date: January 24, 2008, Thur
And then I saw HER...
It was my first time here at this café.
I think it was Kei who suggested that we eat here, so punta naman kami kasama sina Joshua at Dana. We picked the couch near the glass window and ordered our lunch. Habang kami ay masayang kumakain at nagkwekwentuhan, may isang babae ang pumasok...
And then I saw her...
I can't find the right words right now to describe her beauty... But what stuck in my mind was her smile... Her simplicity...
Pero quarter to one na nun, kelangan ng pumasok ulit... So bago umalis, tumingin ulit ako for the last time sa kanyang kagandahan at nasabi...
"Oh well... Hanggang tingin na lang ba?"
- Mark's Journal
Monday, August 20, 2007
Timeless Specials #2: Love does not wait
Yes... Love is not for tomorrow... it is not for later... it should be done now! In every moment and opportunity... love must be done today at this time.
This is a lesson I will never forget.
I was supposed to help in the mini-seminar about worship and I want that my sister attend the seminar. So I "texted" her of her location because she was not there yet.
And then she replied that she will not come. But because I want her to be there, I replied and it sounded a little bit angry, which is somehow true. I felt a little bit irritated then that my sister is passing up an opportunity to learn and maybe share it to others.
She replied back that she will attend the mini-seminar. But I know it is just because I got "angry". So I didn't reply back to her because I may end up fighting with her.
But the unthinkable happened. My mommy and daddy was out then and was planning to go to the seminar by jeep. Then, she collapsed just before she left and was rushed immediately to the hospital. I got the news a little bit later from mommy. She knew what my last reply to my sister because my sister texted her about my text. I asked if was it my fault but she assured me it was not because before my sister left, she was telling mommy that she's a little bit sick. But it didn't help, the burden was with me and I can't concentrate on preparing for my talk.
I was thinking what if my sister will not wake up. It may be partly my fault that she collapsed because of my "persuasive" powers in my text to her. I may not have the chance to say sorry and make amends. But what really burdens me, was that I didn't try to understand her situation before I get irritated. I was not loving her as a brother to a sister. I was not doing my mission. And now this happened that she collapsed without her doing something strenuous. I stormed the heavens and the airwaves (by texting) to pray for my sister.
My prayers were quickly answered because she recovered immediately right after she arrived at the hospital and mommy and daddy was also there. And it was right before my talk that the news arrived. The burden was lifted and I gave out a sigh of relief.
And I reflected upon it while giving my talk (yeah, I was doing two things at that time...) I realized that love does not wait on you. You must always love everybody and you must always do it now... there is no other time to do it but now. People you love may be gone in a flash and you may regret not loving them to the hilt. It was my mission: to learn to love and to show love. And I am not doing it!! That's why I am so burdened that time. I was not doing what God is telling me to do. I still am going back to my selfish self. I still get angry to my parents, I still get a little bit irritated with my brother and sisters. I still am a little bit snobbish to my ministry friends. I still get irritated to people that doesn't follow God. I still get too righteous... And by doing that, I lose every second of opportunity to show love even to the people close to me. I'm not showing God's love to them...
May it be that I remember this day. So I will have the constant effort to love them as I love myself. I may falter, fail, fall, sin... but I will still struggle. It's better to love than to preach how to love. It's better to love than to teach them doctrinal and Catholic truths. They will never understand the truths of the Universal Church if there is no love. They will never understand the teachings if there is no love. They will never learn if there is no love. For even if there is faith, hope, gifts of the Holy Spirit, friends, family, teachings, ministry, great songs and the like, if there is no love, it will be noisy gong or clanging cymbal. Even if I perfected my craft in preaching, in business, and in other things, if there's no love to my family, friends and neighbors, I will have nothing and I will not gain nothing.
For all these things exists; but the greatest of these things will always be love.
PS1. back to our next topic in our subseries: I Will Love Today
PS2. Watch out for our next set of topics: Being Complete
This is a lesson I will never forget.
I was supposed to help in the mini-seminar about worship and I want that my sister attend the seminar. So I "texted" her of her location because she was not there yet.
And then she replied that she will not come. But because I want her to be there, I replied and it sounded a little bit angry, which is somehow true. I felt a little bit irritated then that my sister is passing up an opportunity to learn and maybe share it to others.
She replied back that she will attend the mini-seminar. But I know it is just because I got "angry". So I didn't reply back to her because I may end up fighting with her.
But the unthinkable happened. My mommy and daddy was out then and was planning to go to the seminar by jeep. Then, she collapsed just before she left and was rushed immediately to the hospital. I got the news a little bit later from mommy. She knew what my last reply to my sister because my sister texted her about my text. I asked if was it my fault but she assured me it was not because before my sister left, she was telling mommy that she's a little bit sick. But it didn't help, the burden was with me and I can't concentrate on preparing for my talk.
I was thinking what if my sister will not wake up. It may be partly my fault that she collapsed because of my "persuasive" powers in my text to her. I may not have the chance to say sorry and make amends. But what really burdens me, was that I didn't try to understand her situation before I get irritated. I was not loving her as a brother to a sister. I was not doing my mission. And now this happened that she collapsed without her doing something strenuous. I stormed the heavens and the airwaves (by texting) to pray for my sister.
My prayers were quickly answered because she recovered immediately right after she arrived at the hospital and mommy and daddy was also there. And it was right before my talk that the news arrived. The burden was lifted and I gave out a sigh of relief.
And I reflected upon it while giving my talk (yeah, I was doing two things at that time...) I realized that love does not wait on you. You must always love everybody and you must always do it now... there is no other time to do it but now. People you love may be gone in a flash and you may regret not loving them to the hilt. It was my mission: to learn to love and to show love. And I am not doing it!! That's why I am so burdened that time. I was not doing what God is telling me to do. I still am going back to my selfish self. I still get angry to my parents, I still get a little bit irritated with my brother and sisters. I still am a little bit snobbish to my ministry friends. I still get irritated to people that doesn't follow God. I still get too righteous... And by doing that, I lose every second of opportunity to show love even to the people close to me. I'm not showing God's love to them...
May it be that I remember this day. So I will have the constant effort to love them as I love myself. I may falter, fail, fall, sin... but I will still struggle. It's better to love than to preach how to love. It's better to love than to teach them doctrinal and Catholic truths. They will never understand the truths of the Universal Church if there is no love. They will never understand the teachings if there is no love. They will never learn if there is no love. For even if there is faith, hope, gifts of the Holy Spirit, friends, family, teachings, ministry, great songs and the like, if there is no love, it will be noisy gong or clanging cymbal. Even if I perfected my craft in preaching, in business, and in other things, if there's no love to my family, friends and neighbors, I will have nothing and I will not gain nothing.
For all these things exists; but the greatest of these things will always be love.
PS1. back to our next topic in our subseries: I Will Love Today
PS2. Watch out for our next set of topics: Being Complete
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Love Blog Series # 6.2.3: Loving You
Do You Know God's Name?
I found this site by Pastor Ahyh (www.yhwh.com) and I asked permission to use some of his explanations about God's name.
Now before we begin... How will this be connected in loving your neighbor, your enemy, your friend, your loved-one, your boyfriend, girlfriend, family, mother, father, etc...?
You'll soon find out. Now let's have a special verse that will connect your question to God's name:
"I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me." - Matthew 25:40
Let's start off from where I ended last topic. We have discussed before that we need to love God not because God needs our love but because it is more of a response to His love. It is also for us to learn how to really love. And in loving someone, one thing we must know is that person's name. So what is God's name?
From the bible, we can find the answer from Exodus 3:13-14. This is when Moses actually asked God His Name.
13Then Moses said to God, "Behold, I am going to the sons of Israel, and I will say to them, 'The God of your fathers has sent me to you.' Now they may say to me, 'What is His name?' What shall I say to them?"
14God said to Moses, "I AM WHO I AM"; and He said, "Thus you shall say to the sons of Israel, 'I AM has sent me to you.'" - Exodus 3:13-14
God's Name is not God. It's not Lord. It's even not Jesus. Yes, His name is Jesus when He was on earth. But before being called Jesus, He said His real Name also:
"Jesus said to them, 'Truly, truly, I say to you, before Abraham was born, I am.'" - John 8:58
So God's Name is I AM. Now, this is the translation (or meaning in English words) from the Hebrew texts originally written many years ago. The transliteration (or using the same letters of the English alphabet) of "I AM" is YHWH or YaHWeh. So in Hebrew language, God's Name is Yahweh.
Now in using the Hebrew language, YHWH becomes
is Y meaning Yod, rhymes with "rode"
is H meaning He, rhymes with "say"
is W or V meaning Vav, like "lava"
and another H.
Now, the Hebrews wrote it from right to left making it
But God didn't wrote it left to right or right to left. He wrote it from top to bottom. And He didn't use a pen and paper to write it. He used something else (YES!! He's the Most Creative Writer I've ever known...)
He wrote His Name like this:
You!! He wrote His Name in our very existence and in every existing human being. His Name is you, your neighbor, your enemy, your friend, your loved-one, boyfriend, girlfriend, mother, father, etc... Just look: The Yod is our head, the 1st He is our arms, the Vav is our torso and the last He is our legs. This supports the reason that what we do to the least of our brothers, we do it unto Him. Because His Name is us!! He created us not only in His image and likeness, we are His very Name!! Isn't that amazing?
That's the reason why we need to love others... That's the reason why we need to also love ourselves. We are His very Name. And because we love Him also, we also ought to love others as we love ourselves. It's also a response to His love. Thus, making the only true, logical and basic reason why we love others is because we love our Lord, YHWH (See Love Blog Series #3: True Love Has One Reason Alone).
So, this ends the "knowing" part of this topic series. Now will get into the "internalization" part. Tune in next time for our next topic.
PS1. Sorry for the delay. It's been 2 weeks, I know. I have to ask permission from Pastor Ahyh (Thanks for permitting me to spread the word!!) I also have to "connect the dots" so to speak to make a point :D
PS2. Next topic in our subseries: I Will Love Today
PS3. Watch out for our next set of topics: Being Complete
I found this site by Pastor Ahyh (www.yhwh.com) and I asked permission to use some of his explanations about God's name.
Now before we begin... How will this be connected in loving your neighbor, your enemy, your friend, your loved-one, your boyfriend, girlfriend, family, mother, father, etc...?
You'll soon find out. Now let's have a special verse that will connect your question to God's name:
"I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me." - Matthew 25:40
Let's start off from where I ended last topic. We have discussed before that we need to love God not because God needs our love but because it is more of a response to His love. It is also for us to learn how to really love. And in loving someone, one thing we must know is that person's name. So what is God's name?
From the bible, we can find the answer from Exodus 3:13-14. This is when Moses actually asked God His Name.
13Then Moses said to God, "Behold, I am going to the sons of Israel, and I will say to them, 'The God of your fathers has sent me to you.' Now they may say to me, 'What is His name?' What shall I say to them?"
14God said to Moses, "I AM WHO I AM"; and He said, "Thus you shall say to the sons of Israel, 'I AM has sent me to you.'" - Exodus 3:13-14
God's Name is not God. It's not Lord. It's even not Jesus. Yes, His name is Jesus when He was on earth. But before being called Jesus, He said His real Name also:
"Jesus said to them, 'Truly, truly, I say to you, before Abraham was born, I am.'" - John 8:58
So God's Name is I AM. Now, this is the translation (or meaning in English words) from the Hebrew texts originally written many years ago. The transliteration (or using the same letters of the English alphabet) of "I AM" is YHWH or YaHWeh. So in Hebrew language, God's Name is Yahweh.
Now in using the Hebrew language, YHWH becomes
is Y meaning Yod, rhymes with "rode"
is H meaning He, rhymes with "say"
is W or V meaning Vav, like "lava" and another H.Now, the Hebrews wrote it from right to left making it
But God didn't wrote it left to right or right to left. He wrote it from top to bottom. And He didn't use a pen and paper to write it. He used something else (YES!! He's the Most Creative Writer I've ever known...)
He wrote His Name like this:
You!! He wrote His Name in our very existence and in every existing human being. His Name is you, your neighbor, your enemy, your friend, your loved-one, boyfriend, girlfriend, mother, father, etc... Just look: The Yod is our head, the 1st He is our arms, the Vav is our torso and the last He is our legs. This supports the reason that what we do to the least of our brothers, we do it unto Him. Because His Name is us!! He created us not only in His image and likeness, we are His very Name!! Isn't that amazing?
That's the reason why we need to love others... That's the reason why we need to also love ourselves. We are His very Name. And because we love Him also, we also ought to love others as we love ourselves. It's also a response to His love. Thus, making the only true, logical and basic reason why we love others is because we love our Lord, YHWH (See Love Blog Series #3: True Love Has One Reason Alone).
So, this ends the "knowing" part of this topic series. Now will get into the "internalization" part. Tune in next time for our next topic.
PS1. Sorry for the delay. It's been 2 weeks, I know. I have to ask permission from Pastor Ahyh (Thanks for permitting me to spread the word!!) I also have to "connect the dots" so to speak to make a point :D
PS2. Next topic in our subseries: I Will Love Today
PS3. Watch out for our next set of topics: Being Complete
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Love Blog Series # 6.2.2: Does God need my love?
Have you ever asked this question?
Why did God "commanded" us to love Him?
Does God need my love?
I mean, He, our God, King of kings, Lord of lords, Alpha and Omega, Beginning and End, Creator of heaven and earth, commands us to love Him above everything and with everything that we got...
Our minds, our hearts, our bodies, our souls, our strength... He wants us to love Him. Why? What for?
He is the epitome, source and the very meaning of Love. He is Complete. He will not be sad like us when we are not love. He can erase the very existence of His creations if decides to. He will not feel incomplete even if we don't love Him. He is everything.
So why did He commands us to love Him in the first place?
Here is the reason: The command is for us, not for Him.
You don't get it? The reason He gave you that commandment is for our own good. It is not for Him, it is for us. He didn't create that 1st greatest commandment for us to love Him so that He will be loved and feel being loved just like us. He is the very source and epitome of Love and He is Love Himself thus He doesn't need to be loved just to be loved. The 1st greatest commandment (which encompasses the 1st three commandments God gave to Moses) is meant and created for us.
I can give you three (3) reasons why this greatest commandment is good for us.
1. We are wired, hard-programmed, and created to love... and in this commandment, Him. We search for love in all places. Why do we search it? Because love brings us joy. All of us has also this common reason of loving someone, it is because we are loved. And because we felt love we have joy. Man has the capacity to love because he felt loved first. The problem comes when we ourselves confuse the Giver of Love to something else and then we focus on that something else, we love this "something else" because we thought they give love to us... which brings me to the 2nd reason...
2. God does not and will not leave you... Period. Everything else will leave you, may it be your girlfriend, boyfriend, parents, loved-one, dog, cat, computer game, PC, cellphone, friends, work, academics, grades, bar, beer, money, and even that sexy woman over there... They will leave you. These "something else" will not be there for you always. In truth, The phrase "I'll always be here for you" will not be true always because I, too, also can leave you. So, If you love these things above everything else and give to them all you got... There is 100% even 200% guarantee, no-questions-asked, and pretty sure of it that they will leave you.
Isn't that truth destructive? Devastating? To love "something else" and to give this "something else" everything that you have only to find out that this "something else" will leave you alone... having an unrequited love? Only to find out that this "something else" does not and will not love you until eternity and will just again... leave you alone?
That's why God wants you to love Him... with everything that you have... To focus on Him alone. Yes, you can love your family, friends, work, boyfriend, girlfriend, pets... but they are only second to God. You give everything to God. Because He will never, ever, leave you. Believe me. Your love for Him is secured. Your everything is secured. And you will have fullness of joy until eternity because He is Eternity... He is Infinity. Your world will not crumble because He will always be there for you. Come to think of it, if You love Him, He will be your everything. Now, the reason why He will not leave you brings me to my last reason...
3. God loved, loves and will always love us... In the first place, we will never exist or even cease to exist if He doesn't love us. Because we are formed because of His love. Even everything else exists because of His love. That's why we are wired to love, because He loves. He is love. And in Him we are complete. We attain fullness of joy. That's why our everything is secured in Him because He is Everything.
And because He has loved us first, our response is to love Him back. It is now not a command but an act. A response to what is truly given to us. Because He wants you to be more like Him... Because He created you in His image and likeness... And Because Jesus is also the Father and the Father is also Jesus... and Jesus loves the Father... then we are to do the same... for this response of love to the Father is for us... He gave this so that you can have fullness of joy in His Love.
PS1. Watch out for the next topic in the series: Loving You
PS2. Watch out for our next topic series after this: Being Complete
Why did God "commanded" us to love Him?
Does God need my love?
I mean, He, our God, King of kings, Lord of lords, Alpha and Omega, Beginning and End, Creator of heaven and earth, commands us to love Him above everything and with everything that we got...
Our minds, our hearts, our bodies, our souls, our strength... He wants us to love Him. Why? What for?
He is the epitome, source and the very meaning of Love. He is Complete. He will not be sad like us when we are not love. He can erase the very existence of His creations if decides to. He will not feel incomplete even if we don't love Him. He is everything.
So why did He commands us to love Him in the first place?
Here is the reason: The command is for us, not for Him.
You don't get it? The reason He gave you that commandment is for our own good. It is not for Him, it is for us. He didn't create that 1st greatest commandment for us to love Him so that He will be loved and feel being loved just like us. He is the very source and epitome of Love and He is Love Himself thus He doesn't need to be loved just to be loved. The 1st greatest commandment (which encompasses the 1st three commandments God gave to Moses) is meant and created for us.
I can give you three (3) reasons why this greatest commandment is good for us.
1. We are wired, hard-programmed, and created to love... and in this commandment, Him. We search for love in all places. Why do we search it? Because love brings us joy. All of us has also this common reason of loving someone, it is because we are loved. And because we felt love we have joy. Man has the capacity to love because he felt loved first. The problem comes when we ourselves confuse the Giver of Love to something else and then we focus on that something else, we love this "something else" because we thought they give love to us... which brings me to the 2nd reason...
2. God does not and will not leave you... Period. Everything else will leave you, may it be your girlfriend, boyfriend, parents, loved-one, dog, cat, computer game, PC, cellphone, friends, work, academics, grades, bar, beer, money, and even that sexy woman over there... They will leave you. These "something else" will not be there for you always. In truth, The phrase "I'll always be here for you" will not be true always because I, too, also can leave you. So, If you love these things above everything else and give to them all you got... There is 100% even 200% guarantee, no-questions-asked, and pretty sure of it that they will leave you.
Isn't that truth destructive? Devastating? To love "something else" and to give this "something else" everything that you have only to find out that this "something else" will leave you alone... having an unrequited love? Only to find out that this "something else" does not and will not love you until eternity and will just again... leave you alone?
That's why God wants you to love Him... with everything that you have... To focus on Him alone. Yes, you can love your family, friends, work, boyfriend, girlfriend, pets... but they are only second to God. You give everything to God. Because He will never, ever, leave you. Believe me. Your love for Him is secured. Your everything is secured. And you will have fullness of joy until eternity because He is Eternity... He is Infinity. Your world will not crumble because He will always be there for you. Come to think of it, if You love Him, He will be your everything. Now, the reason why He will not leave you brings me to my last reason...
3. God loved, loves and will always love us... In the first place, we will never exist or even cease to exist if He doesn't love us. Because we are formed because of His love. Even everything else exists because of His love. That's why we are wired to love, because He loves. He is love. And in Him we are complete. We attain fullness of joy. That's why our everything is secured in Him because He is Everything.
And because He has loved us first, our response is to love Him back. It is now not a command but an act. A response to what is truly given to us. Because He wants you to be more like Him... Because He created you in His image and likeness... And Because Jesus is also the Father and the Father is also Jesus... and Jesus loves the Father... then we are to do the same... for this response of love to the Father is for us... He gave this so that you can have fullness of joy in His Love.
PS1. Watch out for the next topic in the series: Loving You
PS2. Watch out for our next topic series after this: Being Complete
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Love Blog Series # 6.2.1: What's Love Got to Do with This?
"Hayyyyy... Love..."
But before we get mushy in this article... let's discuss the definition of love.
What is love anyway?
In the world today, there are many, many, many definitions pertaining to love. Most of them equate love as an intense surge of feelings or emotions. And many people would also say that it is irrational, does not have any reason, and simply a magical thing that people feel.
It may sometimes be connoted to love of country, romantic love, friendship, sexual love, love for thing, and even love for God. And many will say that these vast definitions of love are very unique to each other and are very different from each other. Many would say that these different kinds of love have different intensity of feelings also.
All in all, these boils down to one thing: Love is a feeling.
Pope Benedict, through his encyclical letter entitled: "Deus Caritas Est", wishes to address this very definition of love. Is it really a feeling, much like the Greek word, eros? Is love or true essence of it be ideal and almost impossible to grasp due to the many definitions and intensities to it? Is romantic love very different from the religious love or love for God? Can we be able to do the commandments?
What is really the definition of love?
To have a basic knowledge of it, we will have to use the sentence many of us will say in many different languages to express our love to the other:
"I love you"
Using basic English, this simple sentence represent two parts: A subject and a predicate.
The subject here is the word "I". The predicate here is the phrase "love you" which can be subdivided into two objects: A verb and a direct object. The direct object here is "you" and the verb word is "love".
By the very definition of verb as an action word, the word "love" can be connoted as an action.
We cannot express love if is not an action. And by the very definition of it... Love is an action, the doer of the action is "I" and the receiver of the action is "you".
By receiving the action means receiving the action word "love". And love cannot be received if it is not been given to the receiver.
So what is this love that is to be given? By the meaning of the title of the letter "Deus Caritas Est", it means: God is love. We are to give God as an action to the receiver. But how do we do that?
Looking at the first chapter of Genesis, we can see that we ourselves are made from the image and likeness of God. Thus, in action, we only not give our God... we ought to give ourselves.Thus, the very essence of the true meaning of love. It is an act of self-giving... of self-sacrificing. This is agape used in the New Testament. Then, what are feelings then?
Feelings, the intense emotions that well up inside us, is a byproduct of that love. That is the pursuit defined by eros, supreme infinite happiness often equated to romantic love. Rather than a warped and destructive form of eros that is intoxicated and seeks to reach "divine happiness" for the purpose of feeling the pleasure of being "divine", true eros becomes pure and true when in pursuit of this kind of happiness we ought to give ourselves. Eros and Agape, although different, becomes one in the whole definition of love.
Love becomes one essence but in different manifestations. It is whole. It cannot be gauge into different intensities. It's either you give it whole, or you give an imperfect one. We cannot separate it into different things for if we separate it, we only get an impoverished form of it. And a "half-baked love" is not love at all.
People need love... We need to be loved... and the only thing that quenches that thirst is only through true and perfect love.
Thus, true and perfect love, again, is an action... an act... to give oneself to another... to sacrifice for one neighbor... to serve, give time and effort generously... and its byproduct will always be joy, peace, and love. The feelings that we get when we give generously.
For the more we give and share this love, the more we receive true and perfect love given and acted upon us by our generous God, who gave His Son Jesus, who died for us... just to ultimately define what true love is.
PS. Sorry for the late post, I have to read just part one of the Encyclical letter of the Pope just make this post more understandable and have more "meat" so to speak.
PS2. Watch out for the next topic in the series: Does God need my love?
PS3. Watch out for our next topic series after this: Being Complete
Monday, July 16, 2007
Love Blog Series #6.1: Two Simple Instructions (Subseries special #1)
Did you ever tried NOT to follow the instructions in your test papers?
Deliberately or accidentally?
I did many times and all I got is a zero if not a minus five in my exam or quiz.
Just because I did not follow simple instructions in my test papers.
My topic for this entry is about two simple instructions. Just two.
And yet these two are the most disobeyed instructions since ancient times.
Do you know what are these two?
1. Love God
2. Love others
Simple isn't it? And most of the time, for at least 2000 years... and even before Christ was born, these two instructions were the most disobeyed, often taken-for-granted, and misinterpreted instructions in the world.
I have a hunch that most, if not all, of the unnecessary problems and worries today and even before are due to lack of love. It is due to not following these two simple instructions.
Crime, murder, war, failing the math exam, heartbreaks, divorce, occultism, ouija, rape, population booming, economical crisis, corruption, sin, adultery, bitterness, horror, accidents, blame...
The Greek word used for sin in the New Testament books is called "hamartia" which means "to miss a mark". Thus, by missing the mark or not hitting or obeying these 2 simple instructions actually makes you sin. And sin causes all kinds of unnecessary and useless problems and worries to man.
The whole point now is how do we avoid "missing the mark"? How do we do these instructions? Ultimately, how do we love?
To answer these clearly, We will have to know the problems why we can't easily follow these 2 instructions. There are three reasons why we fail to follow these instructions...
1. We do not know
2. We do not internalize
3. We do not do it
1st, we do not know what love is and why do we need to love. The problem with us today is that we ourselves twisted the very meaning and form of love and corrupted it just to fit into our own selfish needs. Knowing what true love is and the real reasons why we need to love God and others will help us have concrete reasons for us to love them. I believe that in loving you need to know why you love (see Love Blog Series #3: True Love has One Reason Alone). We will discuss it later in our next set of topics what love is and why we need to love.
2nd, it is not enough to know it by mind. We need to know it by heart. Everyday we must internalize and condition ourselves to do the 2 greatest commandments. Again, a full discussion for this part will be done later.
and lastly, after knowing love and conditioning yourself to love, the last important thing is to actually do it. Every preparation will be in vain if not done in action. So here, some of the answers in how to love will be given here.
This topic will be subdivided into parts to answer how can we love God and love others more effectively and then actually "avoid missing the mark". So watch out for our next issues :D
(Next topic in our subseries: What's Love Got to Do with This?)
(Watch out for our next set of topics: Being Complete)
Deliberately or accidentally?
I did many times and all I got is a zero if not a minus five in my exam or quiz.
Just because I did not follow simple instructions in my test papers.
My topic for this entry is about two simple instructions. Just two.
And yet these two are the most disobeyed instructions since ancient times.
Do you know what are these two?
1. Love God
2. Love others
Simple isn't it? And most of the time, for at least 2000 years... and even before Christ was born, these two instructions were the most disobeyed, often taken-for-granted, and misinterpreted instructions in the world.
I have a hunch that most, if not all, of the unnecessary problems and worries today and even before are due to lack of love. It is due to not following these two simple instructions.
Crime, murder, war, failing the math exam, heartbreaks, divorce, occultism, ouija, rape, population booming, economical crisis, corruption, sin, adultery, bitterness, horror, accidents, blame...
The Greek word used for sin in the New Testament books is called "hamartia" which means "to miss a mark". Thus, by missing the mark or not hitting or obeying these 2 simple instructions actually makes you sin. And sin causes all kinds of unnecessary and useless problems and worries to man.
The whole point now is how do we avoid "missing the mark"? How do we do these instructions? Ultimately, how do we love?
To answer these clearly, We will have to know the problems why we can't easily follow these 2 instructions. There are three reasons why we fail to follow these instructions...
1. We do not know
2. We do not internalize
3. We do not do it
1st, we do not know what love is and why do we need to love. The problem with us today is that we ourselves twisted the very meaning and form of love and corrupted it just to fit into our own selfish needs. Knowing what true love is and the real reasons why we need to love God and others will help us have concrete reasons for us to love them. I believe that in loving you need to know why you love (see Love Blog Series #3: True Love has One Reason Alone). We will discuss it later in our next set of topics what love is and why we need to love.
2nd, it is not enough to know it by mind. We need to know it by heart. Everyday we must internalize and condition ourselves to do the 2 greatest commandments. Again, a full discussion for this part will be done later.
and lastly, after knowing love and conditioning yourself to love, the last important thing is to actually do it. Every preparation will be in vain if not done in action. So here, some of the answers in how to love will be given here.
This topic will be subdivided into parts to answer how can we love God and love others more effectively and then actually "avoid missing the mark". So watch out for our next issues :D
(Next topic in our subseries: What's Love Got to Do with This?)
(Watch out for our next set of topics: Being Complete)
Friday, July 13, 2007
Love Blog Series #5: Extension to the Theory of Equivalent Exchange
Remember this theory?
The theory states that "for the exchange to take place, the two key players of the relationship must be somehow complete first before they give it to each other. As for this, they will take what the other has given and the cycle goes on. Because of their completeness, and their readiness, the give-and-take cycle becomes a natural process, like breathing and eating."
(for more explanation, see Love Blog Series #1: The Theory of Equivalent Exchange)
There's an extension to it, which will encompass all other relationships as well.
You may think that when a person gives his whole self to his partner, the partner is fulfilled and is complete from that love being given by her partner. Now I will disagree with that.
Because people are imperfect. We can't give perfect love... remember my last paragraph? That you can't give without being complete... and by being complete you must ask from God to give you first His complete and perfect love so that you can share it to others especially to your partner...
The receiver of love is not really receiving a perfect love from her partner if the love given does not come from God and the giver is not really giving himself and his love completely if the giver doesn't have the love from God.
Thus, the reality of this theory is that the reason behind the completeness of a person inside the cycle of love is not because of the love being completely given to us by the giver but because of the love being given by our Lord.
The cycle really becomes a natural process when we share and give that whole love from our Lord.
Our fulfillment of our needs is really not because of the person who give us love, but because the Lord fulfilled us first our needs (that is why we should be complete first before having a relationship... at this point, we will discuss it in our next topic: Being complete).
And in loving relationship, the Lord uses our partners as His instruments to show His perfect love for us again, and again, and again.
Making us complete again, and again , and again...
And having that kind of reality, we don't need to look after ourselves. Thus, we have more time to look after our partners needs... Because we ourselves are instruments of God to show His love for our partners.
Although this reality looks like that we fulfill them, it is really the Lord using us to love them completely. Isn't that amazing?
To conclude this topic, if you really love... or if I rephrase it: If you really want to love the person you are loving right now (may it be your parent, child, boyfriend, girlfriend, special some-one, spouse, friend) don't just give your imperfect love...
Ask for God to give you first His perfect love to you so that you could share and give His perfect love to others... remember this equation:
Perfect love tenfold = imperfect love from you + perfect love given to you from God
Don't worry about the cycle... you don't need the cycle for the fulfillment of your needs from your partner. Why? Because your needs are met by God's love! (I said it before and I'll say it again... you being complete will not come from your partner... period) The cycle will come and be a natural process after.
God's love is ought to be shared :D It makes His love increase tenfold :D
(Watch out for our next topic in our series: Two Simple Instructions)
The theory states that "for the exchange to take place, the two key players of the relationship must be somehow complete first before they give it to each other. As for this, they will take what the other has given and the cycle goes on. Because of their completeness, and their readiness, the give-and-take cycle becomes a natural process, like breathing and eating."
(for more explanation, see Love Blog Series #1: The Theory of Equivalent Exchange)
There's an extension to it, which will encompass all other relationships as well.
You may think that when a person gives his whole self to his partner, the partner is fulfilled and is complete from that love being given by her partner. Now I will disagree with that.
Because people are imperfect. We can't give perfect love... remember my last paragraph? That you can't give without being complete... and by being complete you must ask from God to give you first His complete and perfect love so that you can share it to others especially to your partner...
The receiver of love is not really receiving a perfect love from her partner if the love given does not come from God and the giver is not really giving himself and his love completely if the giver doesn't have the love from God.
Thus, the reality of this theory is that the reason behind the completeness of a person inside the cycle of love is not because of the love being completely given to us by the giver but because of the love being given by our Lord.
The cycle really becomes a natural process when we share and give that whole love from our Lord.
Our fulfillment of our needs is really not because of the person who give us love, but because the Lord fulfilled us first our needs (that is why we should be complete first before having a relationship... at this point, we will discuss it in our next topic: Being complete).
And in loving relationship, the Lord uses our partners as His instruments to show His perfect love for us again, and again, and again.
Making us complete again, and again , and again...
And having that kind of reality, we don't need to look after ourselves. Thus, we have more time to look after our partners needs... Because we ourselves are instruments of God to show His love for our partners.
Although this reality looks like that we fulfill them, it is really the Lord using us to love them completely. Isn't that amazing?
To conclude this topic, if you really love... or if I rephrase it: If you really want to love the person you are loving right now (may it be your parent, child, boyfriend, girlfriend, special some-one, spouse, friend) don't just give your imperfect love...
Ask for God to give you first His perfect love to you so that you could share and give His perfect love to others... remember this equation:
Perfect love tenfold = imperfect love from you + perfect love given to you from God
Don't worry about the cycle... you don't need the cycle for the fulfillment of your needs from your partner. Why? Because your needs are met by God's love! (I said it before and I'll say it again... you being complete will not come from your partner... period) The cycle will come and be a natural process after.
God's love is ought to be shared :D It makes His love increase tenfold :D
(Watch out for our next topic in our series: Two Simple Instructions)
Friday, June 22, 2007
Love Blog Series #4: Standard Specifications
Have you ever thought why do we need to know the specifications and standards of the products we buy?
For us who buy software or games that can be played in your own PCs, you know what I'm talking about.
Before we buy any game or software, most of us look not only on its reviews but also the minimum requirement specifications or standard it needs for it to be played.
The requirements can be a list like:
-Can run on Operating Systems that are XP,ME,2000,98...
-Should have a memory of 256MB
-Should have a video card supporting 3-d graphics
etc... etc...
and then knowing our own PCs, we see if our own PCs has achieved the minimum requirements or standard specifications of the CD so that the software or game be at least usable or playable if not smooth and efficient in terms of speed (in other words, the PC doesn't crash).
Now what is the relevance of PC requirements to Love life?
For us to have a smooth relationship, we need standards. A list of "Minimum requirements" and "For best performance" to have a workable and smooth relationship with each other.
(I got this from Bo Sanchez and Josh Harris, minimum requirements equals to no-compromise stuff or non-negotiables.)
For many of my friends, they say that we do not need standards because we break them when we found the "one" (even my mom said it to me).
Again, I beg to disagree.
Take note of the premise and the example above, it is for having a workable and smooth relationship.
When you stick to your standards for a partner, you have advantages (and of course disadvantages but that later on). You eliminate at least half of your conflicts in your relationship. Guaranteed!! Well, for the least, you could have eliminated the unhealthy conflicts.
In a relationship, there are conflicts, yes. But not all are healthy, especially the ones that results from misunderstandings that has the same story over and over and over and over and... you know what I mean (and worse, we do not learn from these conflicts).
The reason why we have these unhealthy conflicts with the "wrong" partners is because of many factors (different beliefs, different likes, dislikes, different lifestyles, religion, etc...)
Now I am not much against with "opposites attract" because it is still possible but I can tell you, it is quite hard. Well, not really quite, but very hard. Adjusting to each other differences for too much can be spiritually, emotionally, and physically draining.
Speaking of adjusting, as a human person, we can't adjust too much of ourselves, more so for our partners who "wants" us to be what they "want" us to be. Because the danger of adjusting too much is we can disregard the real plan for us by our Lord. The problem with adjusting too much also is that we change our definition of ourselves not because as the Lord wants but as what our partners "wants". Another problem is we become a liquid, a blob... no backbone... no identity. Our identity is just formed because of the container of "wants" of your partner.
Now I go back to my topic, why do we need standards? When you dive into a relationship, you just don't go diving in without any reason. You just don't love a person just because the person is beautiful, with money, etc... The reason why you decided to love the person for the rest of your whole life and dive into an exclusive relationship is to serve God through this person (See Love Blog Series#3: True Love has One Reason Alone).
A relationship becomes one entity where both of you serve and give more than when you serve and give as two separate individuals. Again, you cannot give what you do not have. If your relationship is not healthy, you can't serve and give healthily. If your relationship is healthy, you can serve and give healthily. A healthy relationship doesn't mean it is void of conflicts, but it means that you have accepted each other's individual identities and has fulfilled a "basic requirement" to make the relationship work, have a purpose and reason why you love each other, and its (the relationship's) center is God and His love.
God created you uniquely, you have needs and wants. You have your own set of standards, know them clearly. and stick to it... You'll never regret this decision.
Because you're a child of God, You deserve the best for you.
For us who buy software or games that can be played in your own PCs, you know what I'm talking about.
Before we buy any game or software, most of us look not only on its reviews but also the minimum requirement specifications or standard it needs for it to be played.
The requirements can be a list like:
-Can run on Operating Systems that are XP,ME,2000,98...
-Should have a memory of 256MB
-Should have a video card supporting 3-d graphics
etc... etc...
and then knowing our own PCs, we see if our own PCs has achieved the minimum requirements or standard specifications of the CD so that the software or game be at least usable or playable if not smooth and efficient in terms of speed (in other words, the PC doesn't crash).
Now what is the relevance of PC requirements to Love life?
For us to have a smooth relationship, we need standards. A list of "Minimum requirements" and "For best performance" to have a workable and smooth relationship with each other.
(I got this from Bo Sanchez and Josh Harris, minimum requirements equals to no-compromise stuff or non-negotiables.)
For many of my friends, they say that we do not need standards because we break them when we found the "one" (even my mom said it to me).
Again, I beg to disagree.
Take note of the premise and the example above, it is for having a workable and smooth relationship.
When you stick to your standards for a partner, you have advantages (and of course disadvantages but that later on). You eliminate at least half of your conflicts in your relationship. Guaranteed!! Well, for the least, you could have eliminated the unhealthy conflicts.
In a relationship, there are conflicts, yes. But not all are healthy, especially the ones that results from misunderstandings that has the same story over and over and over and over and... you know what I mean (and worse, we do not learn from these conflicts).
The reason why we have these unhealthy conflicts with the "wrong" partners is because of many factors (different beliefs, different likes, dislikes, different lifestyles, religion, etc...)
Now I am not much against with "opposites attract" because it is still possible but I can tell you, it is quite hard. Well, not really quite, but very hard. Adjusting to each other differences for too much can be spiritually, emotionally, and physically draining.
Speaking of adjusting, as a human person, we can't adjust too much of ourselves, more so for our partners who "wants" us to be what they "want" us to be. Because the danger of adjusting too much is we can disregard the real plan for us by our Lord. The problem with adjusting too much also is that we change our definition of ourselves not because as the Lord wants but as what our partners "wants". Another problem is we become a liquid, a blob... no backbone... no identity. Our identity is just formed because of the container of "wants" of your partner.
Now I go back to my topic, why do we need standards? When you dive into a relationship, you just don't go diving in without any reason. You just don't love a person just because the person is beautiful, with money, etc... The reason why you decided to love the person for the rest of your whole life and dive into an exclusive relationship is to serve God through this person (See Love Blog Series#3: True Love has One Reason Alone).
A relationship becomes one entity where both of you serve and give more than when you serve and give as two separate individuals. Again, you cannot give what you do not have. If your relationship is not healthy, you can't serve and give healthily. If your relationship is healthy, you can serve and give healthily. A healthy relationship doesn't mean it is void of conflicts, but it means that you have accepted each other's individual identities and has fulfilled a "basic requirement" to make the relationship work, have a purpose and reason why you love each other, and its (the relationship's) center is God and His love.
God created you uniquely, you have needs and wants. You have your own set of standards, know them clearly. and stick to it... You'll never regret this decision.
Because you're a child of God, You deserve the best for you.
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Love Blog Series #3: True Love has One Reason Alone
One day I got a text message from one of my friends in the ministry. The message asked if there is a reason behind loving a person.
Then it was followed by a series of premises that if the reason for loving the person is because he or she is funny and he or she makes you happy, what if the person stops being funny at all? Will you still love the person?
What if your reason is because the person is beautiful? What if the person suddenly becomes ugly, will you still love the person?
What if your reason is because the person can provide you with your needs? What if the person suddenly loses its job and can't provide for you, will you still love the person?
Then it was followed that love defies all reasons, when you love, you just do...
Ask me if I agree to that last line a year ago (2006), I would say a resounding yes... I said that many times to the last exclusive relationship I once had.
Ask me now, I will beg to disagree.
Why? Because I now firmly believe that when you love, you just don't love blindly, like you don't know why you love. You just don't do it without any logic and reason at all. I don't believe that there's no logic behind love.
True Love has only One Reason Alone, and it is logically sound also.
How can that be?
Is there really a reason why you love a person?
Yes!!
To prove that, I'll tell you 2 theological premises I got from my preacher friends.
1st Premise: Everything has a reason and purpose under God's presence.
2nd Premise: Nothing exists outside God's presence.
Thus, if everything, including love, has a reason under God's presence and nothing exists outside His presence, then I could say that love has a reason after all. That when you love a person, it has a reason.
Now why is it that there is only one reason? Why not many?
When you love, to be genuine and true, a person has to base it on some good foundation.
Getting the premises of the text message from my friend, I could say that those reasons are not good foundations because they can change in time and nature. If your foundation changes without prior notice, it is like building your house of love in a sandy land: It gets destroyed by the winds, waves, storms and floods of problems and uncertainties.
The point here is you can't base your love with reasons that are not good to withstand any problem that could brake your relationship. You should base it on solid ground. And there is one solid ground that cannot be shaken even if magnitude 9 happens.
Are you ready for that reason? Because it has shaken every belief that I had before about love. And this had become one of my core beliefs in this world.
You love this person because you want to serve God, you want to love God more in serving and loving him or her.
That's the basic idea, the basic reason, the only reason why you love or you should love a person. Because you are loving God. And when you love God, you obey His commandments. And His 10 commandments which is compressed into two are to love God with all your heart, mind and strength and to love others as He has loved you. The former can be seen in the 1st three of the Gospels and the latter commandment can be seen at all four Gospels.
See? This is the basic and solid foundation, and your love for that person will never fail because of this.
It's a lame excuse to say that you love a person without any reason... that when you love a person you just do. It means only that you really didn't love that person truly.
I know, been there... done that. And it is a bad thing, because when shaken by problems... your love, and all of its "foundations" (actually there are no foundations when you just love... when you just do it), will just crumble down into ruins (and may actually be just a feeling after all... that's why you don't have any reason at all...)
That's why...
You do not love because she is beautiful, because beauty fades.
You do not love because he has met your standards, because he might fail to live it at some point in time. (but you still need standards, more on this on the next topic of our Love Blog Series on why we still need to have standards)
You do not love because he provides for you, because he still might lose his job.
You do not love because of the feeling, because feelings fly away the way they just come in, unnoticed and often times uncontrollable. (this is what you call, falling-in love and falling-out-of love... other words: infatuation)
You do not love because the person loves you back, because you may not feel that person's love at times (but there are many ways to feel and make the other person feel your love. We will also discuss the most discussed topic about the languages of love on another topic in our Love blog series)
There is only one reason why you love, and that is:
You love because you love God, and by loving this person you are loving God more.
And this is what you call genuine and true love.
Then it was followed by a series of premises that if the reason for loving the person is because he or she is funny and he or she makes you happy, what if the person stops being funny at all? Will you still love the person?
What if your reason is because the person is beautiful? What if the person suddenly becomes ugly, will you still love the person?
What if your reason is because the person can provide you with your needs? What if the person suddenly loses its job and can't provide for you, will you still love the person?
Then it was followed that love defies all reasons, when you love, you just do...
Ask me if I agree to that last line a year ago (2006), I would say a resounding yes... I said that many times to the last exclusive relationship I once had.
Ask me now, I will beg to disagree.
Why? Because I now firmly believe that when you love, you just don't love blindly, like you don't know why you love. You just don't do it without any logic and reason at all. I don't believe that there's no logic behind love.
True Love has only One Reason Alone, and it is logically sound also.
How can that be?
Is there really a reason why you love a person?
Yes!!
To prove that, I'll tell you 2 theological premises I got from my preacher friends.
1st Premise: Everything has a reason and purpose under God's presence.
2nd Premise: Nothing exists outside God's presence.
Thus, if everything, including love, has a reason under God's presence and nothing exists outside His presence, then I could say that love has a reason after all. That when you love a person, it has a reason.
Now why is it that there is only one reason? Why not many?
When you love, to be genuine and true, a person has to base it on some good foundation.
Getting the premises of the text message from my friend, I could say that those reasons are not good foundations because they can change in time and nature. If your foundation changes without prior notice, it is like building your house of love in a sandy land: It gets destroyed by the winds, waves, storms and floods of problems and uncertainties.
The point here is you can't base your love with reasons that are not good to withstand any problem that could brake your relationship. You should base it on solid ground. And there is one solid ground that cannot be shaken even if magnitude 9 happens.
Are you ready for that reason? Because it has shaken every belief that I had before about love. And this had become one of my core beliefs in this world.
You love this person because you want to serve God, you want to love God more in serving and loving him or her.
That's the basic idea, the basic reason, the only reason why you love or you should love a person. Because you are loving God. And when you love God, you obey His commandments. And His 10 commandments which is compressed into two are to love God with all your heart, mind and strength and to love others as He has loved you. The former can be seen in the 1st three of the Gospels and the latter commandment can be seen at all four Gospels.
See? This is the basic and solid foundation, and your love for that person will never fail because of this.
It's a lame excuse to say that you love a person without any reason... that when you love a person you just do. It means only that you really didn't love that person truly.
I know, been there... done that. And it is a bad thing, because when shaken by problems... your love, and all of its "foundations" (actually there are no foundations when you just love... when you just do it), will just crumble down into ruins (and may actually be just a feeling after all... that's why you don't have any reason at all...)
That's why...
You do not love because she is beautiful, because beauty fades.
You do not love because he has met your standards, because he might fail to live it at some point in time. (but you still need standards, more on this on the next topic of our Love Blog Series on why we still need to have standards)
You do not love because he provides for you, because he still might lose his job.
You do not love because of the feeling, because feelings fly away the way they just come in, unnoticed and often times uncontrollable. (this is what you call, falling-in love and falling-out-of love... other words: infatuation)
You do not love because the person loves you back, because you may not feel that person's love at times (but there are many ways to feel and make the other person feel your love. We will also discuss the most discussed topic about the languages of love on another topic in our Love blog series)
There is only one reason why you love, and that is:
You love because you love God, and by loving this person you are loving God more.
And this is what you call genuine and true love.
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Love Blog Series #2: Sweet Tooth
A 500-peso gift given by a guy to his girlfriend.
An extravagant gift saying "I really really love you" in beautiful word-art and is given to a girl.
Three 1500-peso bouquet of roses given to a girl by her suitor for "breakfast", "lunch" and "dinner".
A 3-paged letter saying all things about love and life with her and how happy he is to actually meet and be with her and is given every monthsary to his girlfriend.
Bought a stuffed-toy, a dog, and gave it as a Christmas gift to his girlfriend.
Prepared a surprise for his "crush". Contacted a local coffee shop for reservations, bought a bouquet of the girl's most favorite flowers, bought a teddy bear, created his own card, prepared the place, and totally surprised the girl.
These are 5 different situations. Maybe 5 different sets of people who have done these things. What do these 5 situations have in common?
Common point: All has gifts being given. Outwardly expressing that the guy loved the girl.
Sweet right? Not quite.
Ask me that question at the time when I was 18 years-old and I would totally go into "kilig" mode and say... "Wow!! How sweet!! Grabe astigin!!"
Ask me now, I'm sorry to shatter your sweet tooth, but I'll say "Not quite... Not sweet enough"
Not long ago, a friend of mine got an extravagant (when I say extravagant, it means something that is nearly out-of-reach to be bought by a non-working student because of financial matters and stuff... i.e. a 1500-peso gift bought by a 4th year highschool student... if you know what I mean) gift from his boyfriend. Another friend of mine was there when she got it and was amazed on how the guy really "loved" the girl. Contradictory to what my friend said, my left eyebrow is lifted and said in reply "You call that love? My dog could do that." (Ok, I didn't said that last sentence but I did just put it here just for a laugh).
My friend said in reply, "Why? He's so sweet!! Giving that thing..."
"O come on, that is sweet? You call that sweet?!!" In my mind, candy was sweeter than that.
"Yes it is!! It is because your standards are too high..." my friend replied in defense for that gift.
Standards? Well, I guess my "standards" are too high... Sweetness for me is when couples love each other. For me, it is when they show each other true love in real and simple ways like hugging each other, saying "I love you" 7 times a day (and he means it when he says it), fulfilling each others needs, doing things together, serving each other, loving each other, sharing each other's lives... Yes, these are my standards of sweetness: When they genuinely express the Love of God to each other that it is so contagious even their friends feel it when they are together.
It's not the gift...
It's not the beautiful "I love you"s in artful letters...
It's not in the roses...
It's in the couple's everyday lives, serving and loving each other, that makes their sweetness profound and felt to the bone by others around them and they themselves.
I didn't feel the love from the gift given to my friend that day. It's just once-in-a-blue-moon event. No follow-ups. No fulfillment of needs. No real service. Just feelings... In other words, "Love" for them was just a matter of feelings and not really an action that should be taken seriously.
True Sweetness is a by-product when True Love is felt. True Love is felt only by self-giving. In a relationship, you do not have time to think of your needs. Because your needs is automatically fulfilled by your partner. Thus, you use the time to fulfill your partner's needs by self-giving. This is what you call "The Theory of Equivalent Exchange" in relationships (See Love Blog Series #1: The Theory of Equivalent Exchange).
It's not a matter of how many gifts he or she has given you...
It's not even a matter of how much each gift costs...
It's also not a matter of how many "I love you" sentences he or she has blurted out to you...
Not even on how many kisses you have made...
or even on how long you have been together...
Sweetness cannot be found there.
As long as there is no quality... All these are fake.
As long as there is no service and self-sacrifice... All these are fake.
As long as there is no True Love... All these are fake.
Sweetness can only be felt when you truly love each other; when you truly serve each other; when you truly feel God's Love surrounding both you.
And that what's sweetness is all about.
An extravagant gift saying "I really really love you" in beautiful word-art and is given to a girl.
Three 1500-peso bouquet of roses given to a girl by her suitor for "breakfast", "lunch" and "dinner".
A 3-paged letter saying all things about love and life with her and how happy he is to actually meet and be with her and is given every monthsary to his girlfriend.
Bought a stuffed-toy, a dog, and gave it as a Christmas gift to his girlfriend.
Prepared a surprise for his "crush". Contacted a local coffee shop for reservations, bought a bouquet of the girl's most favorite flowers, bought a teddy bear, created his own card, prepared the place, and totally surprised the girl.
These are 5 different situations. Maybe 5 different sets of people who have done these things. What do these 5 situations have in common?
Common point: All has gifts being given. Outwardly expressing that the guy loved the girl.
Sweet right? Not quite.
Ask me that question at the time when I was 18 years-old and I would totally go into "kilig" mode and say... "Wow!! How sweet!! Grabe astigin!!"
Ask me now, I'm sorry to shatter your sweet tooth, but I'll say "Not quite... Not sweet enough"
Not long ago, a friend of mine got an extravagant (when I say extravagant, it means something that is nearly out-of-reach to be bought by a non-working student because of financial matters and stuff... i.e. a 1500-peso gift bought by a 4th year highschool student... if you know what I mean) gift from his boyfriend. Another friend of mine was there when she got it and was amazed on how the guy really "loved" the girl. Contradictory to what my friend said, my left eyebrow is lifted and said in reply "You call that love? My dog could do that." (Ok, I didn't said that last sentence but I did just put it here just for a laugh).
My friend said in reply, "Why? He's so sweet!! Giving that thing..."
"O come on, that is sweet? You call that sweet?!!" In my mind, candy was sweeter than that.
"Yes it is!! It is because your standards are too high..." my friend replied in defense for that gift.
Standards? Well, I guess my "standards" are too high... Sweetness for me is when couples love each other. For me, it is when they show each other true love in real and simple ways like hugging each other, saying "I love you" 7 times a day (and he means it when he says it), fulfilling each others needs, doing things together, serving each other, loving each other, sharing each other's lives... Yes, these are my standards of sweetness: When they genuinely express the Love of God to each other that it is so contagious even their friends feel it when they are together.
It's not the gift...
It's not the beautiful "I love you"s in artful letters...
It's not in the roses...
It's in the couple's everyday lives, serving and loving each other, that makes their sweetness profound and felt to the bone by others around them and they themselves.
I didn't feel the love from the gift given to my friend that day. It's just once-in-a-blue-moon event. No follow-ups. No fulfillment of needs. No real service. Just feelings... In other words, "Love" for them was just a matter of feelings and not really an action that should be taken seriously.
True Sweetness is a by-product when True Love is felt. True Love is felt only by self-giving. In a relationship, you do not have time to think of your needs. Because your needs is automatically fulfilled by your partner. Thus, you use the time to fulfill your partner's needs by self-giving. This is what you call "The Theory of Equivalent Exchange" in relationships (See Love Blog Series #1: The Theory of Equivalent Exchange).
It's not a matter of how many gifts he or she has given you...
It's not even a matter of how much each gift costs...
It's also not a matter of how many "I love you" sentences he or she has blurted out to you...
Not even on how many kisses you have made...
or even on how long you have been together...
Sweetness cannot be found there.
As long as there is no quality... All these are fake.
As long as there is no service and self-sacrifice... All these are fake.
As long as there is no True Love... All these are fake.
Sweetness can only be felt when you truly love each other; when you truly serve each other; when you truly feel God's Love surrounding both you.
And that what's sweetness is all about.
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Love Blog Series #1: The Theory of Equivalent Exchange
I have this relationship theory that I've been thinking about.
Although this theory is primarily built on the premise of a romantic or loving boy-girl relationship, It can also be used in friendship, family and other kinds of relationship but in a different level.
But for this, I'll have to focus on the boy-girl or in a matured sense, man-woman relationship.
My theory is entitled: "The Theory of Equivalent Exchange". Based on the classic law from the Anime series, Full Metal Alchemist.
This theory is not of my own in the first place. It is because that it was unconsciously done by (veteran) couples and although the foundations of this theory was discussed by preachers and speakers before, I would like to just name it just for the sake of giving it a name for establishment.
The theory states that "for the exchange to take place, the two key players of the relationship must be somehow complete first before they give it to each other. As for this, they will take what the other has given and the cycle goes on. Because of their completeness, and their readiness, the give-and-take cycle becomes a natural process, like breathing and eating."
Do you understand the theory? I'll explain further...
In simple terms, realistically, to have a good start in a relationship (and also a good flow in a relationship), you have to be ready and complete, maturity-wise in terms of physical, spiritual and most especially emotional, before you dive into a relationship. You cannot give what you do not have.
Now why give? To answer that, I have to make an example. An immatured relationship would have two people always after their own good, their own selves. An immatured relationship would be composed of at least 1 person who is immatured.
And an immatured person (although this is just a part) is always not complete and not ready. In a way, one doesn't know one's self. Thus, making him "incomplete" and often times finds someone who could "complete" him or her.
If one knows one's self, he finds completeness and contentment. If one finds himself complete and content, he finds joy. And by sharing joy equals more joy. That is why we need to give one's self. Because it is really not the need to complete you but the need to share your complete self, your joyful state that you feel more joy.
Also when one knows one's self, he knows what he needs. Thus, finding the right partner (without quotation marks) will be easy because you know what to find for a partner. Thus, once you found that partner, only little and minor adjustments will be made for a good, realistic, exciting, joyful, steady and loving relationship.
Given these, if the 2 key players in the relationship are matured enough, one will not feel the need to look after one's self if he or she is fulfilled. Why? Because their needs are fulfilled unconsiously by their partner who gives themselves to them, leaving them more oppurtunity to give themselves to their partners more and vice-versa. This often overlooked phenomena was the reason why people stick together. It is because it becomes a natural process for them to give rather than to look after themselves and their needs. It becomes natural to look after their partner's needs because they are confident that their partner will look after their needs. That is where the cycle of love happens. You give what you have, you get what you the other gives. Equivalent exchange.
The last thing is why take? To take is to appreciate what is given. Appreciation is a response. Which is also to give. To take something is to give a response of saying 'Thank You for giving your Love to me." By saying that, the giver is more energized to give you more of that. Because you gave the giver due praise that he deserves. Which is true for that person because the giver becomes the reciever when you also give your love in return. You will be giving if the reciever appreciates you and praises you.
So now, we have discussed the semi-nitty-gritty-stuff of this theory. complete-give-take topic. To end this, I will end it in full circle. Before we are to be complete, we have to ask for help from someone to complete us. And that Someone is here. He is Big. He is Strong. And He is Complete beyond reasonable doubt. He will give you Love. This Love, when felt by your heart, brings joy. And this joy you will want to share, right? Especially to the one you love... that special someone in your life. Always ask the Father for that Love in all your relationships. Make Jesus your first Special Someone, so that when he lavishly and generously gives you His overflowing Love, you will not contain it that you have no choice but to share it to your special someone... your partner in Christ.
Although this theory is primarily built on the premise of a romantic or loving boy-girl relationship, It can also be used in friendship, family and other kinds of relationship but in a different level.
But for this, I'll have to focus on the boy-girl or in a matured sense, man-woman relationship.
My theory is entitled: "The Theory of Equivalent Exchange". Based on the classic law from the Anime series, Full Metal Alchemist.
This theory is not of my own in the first place. It is because that it was unconsciously done by (veteran) couples and although the foundations of this theory was discussed by preachers and speakers before, I would like to just name it just for the sake of giving it a name for establishment.
The theory states that "for the exchange to take place, the two key players of the relationship must be somehow complete first before they give it to each other. As for this, they will take what the other has given and the cycle goes on. Because of their completeness, and their readiness, the give-and-take cycle becomes a natural process, like breathing and eating."
Do you understand the theory? I'll explain further...
In simple terms, realistically, to have a good start in a relationship (and also a good flow in a relationship), you have to be ready and complete, maturity-wise in terms of physical, spiritual and most especially emotional, before you dive into a relationship. You cannot give what you do not have.
Now why give? To answer that, I have to make an example. An immatured relationship would have two people always after their own good, their own selves. An immatured relationship would be composed of at least 1 person who is immatured.
And an immatured person (although this is just a part) is always not complete and not ready. In a way, one doesn't know one's self. Thus, making him "incomplete" and often times finds someone who could "complete" him or her.
If one knows one's self, he finds completeness and contentment. If one finds himself complete and content, he finds joy. And by sharing joy equals more joy. That is why we need to give one's self. Because it is really not the need to complete you but the need to share your complete self, your joyful state that you feel more joy.
Also when one knows one's self, he knows what he needs. Thus, finding the right partner (without quotation marks) will be easy because you know what to find for a partner. Thus, once you found that partner, only little and minor adjustments will be made for a good, realistic, exciting, joyful, steady and loving relationship.
Given these, if the 2 key players in the relationship are matured enough, one will not feel the need to look after one's self if he or she is fulfilled. Why? Because their needs are fulfilled unconsiously by their partner who gives themselves to them, leaving them more oppurtunity to give themselves to their partners more and vice-versa. This often overlooked phenomena was the reason why people stick together. It is because it becomes a natural process for them to give rather than to look after themselves and their needs. It becomes natural to look after their partner's needs because they are confident that their partner will look after their needs. That is where the cycle of love happens. You give what you have, you get what you the other gives. Equivalent exchange.
The last thing is why take? To take is to appreciate what is given. Appreciation is a response. Which is also to give. To take something is to give a response of saying 'Thank You for giving your Love to me." By saying that, the giver is more energized to give you more of that. Because you gave the giver due praise that he deserves. Which is true for that person because the giver becomes the reciever when you also give your love in return. You will be giving if the reciever appreciates you and praises you.
So now, we have discussed the semi-nitty-gritty-stuff of this theory. complete-give-take topic. To end this, I will end it in full circle. Before we are to be complete, we have to ask for help from someone to complete us. And that Someone is here. He is Big. He is Strong. And He is Complete beyond reasonable doubt. He will give you Love. This Love, when felt by your heart, brings joy. And this joy you will want to share, right? Especially to the one you love... that special someone in your life. Always ask the Father for that Love in all your relationships. Make Jesus your first Special Someone, so that when he lavishly and generously gives you His overflowing Love, you will not contain it that you have no choice but to share it to your special someone... your partner in Christ.
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Introduction to New Series: Love Blog Series
This will be an introduction for my new series of blog entries about a certain topic.
The topic is about Love. Yes, the ups-and-downs, the left-and-right, the right-and-wrong.
The title for this series will be Love Blog Series...
And thanks to some of my friends inspiring me to create this series (although they didn't know that I am really creating this... Only just one of them did know about it... and she knew also my first topic to be written in this series).
So any blog entry will be under this series will be titled Love Blog Series: [title of the topic]
If you have any question or anything that you want to ask about love, just write in my guestbook at multiply and I'll try to research upon it and maybe I could put it as another entry for this series :D
Again, thanks for reading and God bless :D
The topic is about Love. Yes, the ups-and-downs, the left-and-right, the right-and-wrong.
The title for this series will be Love Blog Series...
And thanks to some of my friends inspiring me to create this series (although they didn't know that I am really creating this... Only just one of them did know about it... and she knew also my first topic to be written in this series).
So any blog entry will be under this series will be titled Love Blog Series: [title of the topic]
If you have any question or anything that you want to ask about love, just write in my guestbook at multiply and I'll try to research upon it and maybe I could put it as another entry for this series :D
Again, thanks for reading and God bless :D
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